I'm tired. It's late at night and I've been gone from home awhile now. Work is wearing on me and E has her grips on me right now. I struggle to keep at this. I'm tired of always thinking of this. I don't want to talk about it anymore. I don't want to worry about who knows what. I don't want to 'Write a book'. I just want to be normal.
I need M's warmth by me. I need the normalcy that K gives me. I need time to just be a woman. Time to learn her ways. Time to stop thinking so much. We finished work late tonight. I've been struggling with E all day and she's winning. I just manage to get to my hotel room before the crying starts. I sit in the dark crying just wanting all of this to become easy.
I can't even tell you why this is so hard. But it is.